Writing – Page 2 – Barbara Heagy

Journals – Many Different Forms

The beginning of a new year can be a great opportunity to start a journal. I have kept journals ever since my teen years in one form or another. A journal doesn’t have to be a daily jotting down of your day’s activities, although it can be. They can take many forms and I have many different ways of recording my life.

Since the pandemic was declared March 11, 2020, I have kept a daily log of my activities and whereabouts in red pen on a big calendar on the wall. I figured it would be a good way to see how often I really did exercise or see family and friends and it would be good for contact tracing if I ever needed to do that. I didn’t think it would last this long. I’m still writing in red pen every day.

Photo journals are also a way of documenting your life. I take a lot of photos in my life, sometimes for creative expression, but also to chronicle my own life. I love creating photo essays with pictures and short explanations to look back on my days and events. This year I started my “Coronawalk” series to record my frequent walks in my neighbourhood and nature areas. It’s wonderful to look back on them and relive the memories.

For many years now I have kept a reading journal, listing every book I read and recording the author, a short summary, and my own * rating. I don’t know about you but I have trouble remembering titles and authors when I try and recall a good read for a friend. Now I have my trusty reading journal to check and refresh my memory.

I travel a lot (or used to before the pandemic) and I have always kept a travel journal, recording my day’s activities and the names of places and people as I go. It helps me keep track of the days, where I’m going and what I’m doing, and also to remember unusual names and spellings.

I do also have a more traditional journal notebook beside me at all times but I use it in less traditional ways. Yes, I use it to write about my day filling it with my spontaneous thoughts and responses. I also fill it with quotes I come across in my reading, summaries of information in my research, quick interesting facts, and names and numbers of people I want to remember, as well as births, deaths, marriages, and other special events so that I can always check back for specific dates and other information. This is also where I record my dreams, meditations, gratitude, and creative ideas. My journals fill up fast. I have a stack of them all in different shapes and colours in my bedside table.

My Facebook writer page and WordPress blog was started in November 10, 2014, before the publication of my first book “10 – A Story of Love, Life, and Loss.” My first entry said, “Hello followers. I have created this page to share musings, ideas and other writings that contribute to understanding, encouraging and uplifting each other in this path we call life.” On my Facebook writer page (www.facebook.com/barbaraheagywriter) I have continued to post something every day for the last six years. I see it as a form of journal, a way of expressing daily gratitude or fears, not only for my readers, but for myself. I post at least once a month on my blog. Sometimes I want to impart some good information about reading and writing or sometimes I just want to post a funny meme or joke for a good chuckle or laugh. I enjoy writing them and I hope you enjoy reading them.

As you can see, journals can take many forms. Do you journal? Tell me about it.

Eramosa Eden Support

http://www.eramosaeden.org/

Eramosa Eden is a spiritual retreat centre for renewing body, mind, and spirit and, for the last five years, it has been an important place for me to replenish and inspire me as a writer, author, and photographer. They now need our help.

Over the period of five years, I have attended full-day writer workshops where I was given opportunity to meet with other like-minded people, to build a community of support and encouragement and to write freely in the variety of settings, both indoors and outdoors, in this beautiful and inspiring place. The rustic buildings, the cedar forest, the bubbling river are all conducive to creating an environment of peace and creativity.

For two years, I was happy to be part of the River Writers group that met bi-weekly in the rooms and buildings of Eramosa Eden where my writing skills and creativity were stretched and stimulated. How wonderful to have such a place to bond together with other creative and talented writers and authors.

My photography club, Into Focus Photography Club, which meets monthly at the Evergreen Seniors Community Centre, enjoyed a stimulating and productive day at Eramosa Eden taking photos of the natural beauty that abounds in this special place.

I, for one, would hate to see this veritable treasure of nature, creativity and spirituality, be lost to another cause or development. It has been an important part of my own growth, not only as a writer and artist, but personally, it has been a quiet retreat of beauty and replenishment, a place to renew my body and soul.

One need only to wander the rooms and the forest to see how important Eramosa Eden has been to many others who have dedicated their time, materials, and efforts to creating beauty in this magical place. Many have left behind a piece of themselves through paintings, weavings, and other creations, all as an offering of gratitude for what has been given to them.

The world needs places like Eramosa Eden. They act as sanctuaries of peace and creativity, places where one can get away from the maddening pace of our regular lives and replenish and stimulate our minds and senses in a quiet and beautiful natural setting. Can you help? Write a letter of support “To Whom It May Concern” and address it to Gloria Nye at glorianye@gmail.com

Writing for Healing – A Response Poem to Rumi

Back in June, I attended a writing workshop with Kat McNichol called “Writing for Healing” in Eden Mills. As one of the quick writing prompts, I wrote a poem Not Me. It was written in response to the poet Rumi’s poem Not Here.

When the poem was introduced to us by Kat, I had such a negative internal response that I decided I should just deal with it in a written response. The result, created in five minutes, showed me the level of anger and weariness I had in dealing with the grief of my deceased husband and love of my life.

Kat asked if she could publish the poem in her online newsletter. Check out the poems (Rumi’s original and mine) and other stories by clicking on the link below.

A Response to Rumi

And by the way — if you have a chance to take a workshop with Kat McNichol, do it! She’s a fabulous teacher. There is another ‘Writing for Healing’ workshop coming up in October. Check for details at www.dreamerswriting.com.

A Response Poem to Rumi’s Not Here

Not Me by Barbara Heagy

Oh, Rumi.
I do not want to hear this right now.
Don’t speak to me about bravery and sharp
compassion.
I have had howling hurt
And it sucks.

I have stood strong and full of courage.
“Turn and face the lions,” I said.
But the lions’ roaring pains my eardrums.
Their carnivorous breath makes me faint.
Their overpowering size tires me
As I pace the cage with them.

Copper and gold are not for me.
I have accumulated a treasure house of
such so-called riches.
Give me sun.
Give me breath.
God, give me pastrami.
Anything but more of your precious metals.

I am not half-hearted.
I am empty-hearted
Facing your sizzling ovens that shape the soul.

Empty-hearted, holding back,
I am now just well-enough and getting by.

Your challenge has depleted me,
Frozen my thoughts into debilitating ideas of
“I can do this.
This will be good for me.”

Well F’ you, Rumi.
I walk away from this challenge.
I’ve given at the office, thank you.

I Am From

As an introduction to each other at our recent Rhythmwood Soul Journey, Wendy Roman asked us to write a poem about ourselves from a basic form called “I Am From . . . “. All we had to do was fill in the blanks as we reminisced about our past and contemplated all the people and events that had formed who we are today. Here is my poem. What would your poem be?

I Am From by Barbara Heagy

I am from country farms,
From czardas and paprikash.

I am from grandma’s warm lap
like sheltering laughter.

I am from lilacs, fresh mown hay,
and bubbling creeks.

I am from hippies and hash,
From cool northern lakes and jumping fish.

I am from journals and contemplations,
From words and books and songs.

I am from breath and moving bodies.

I am from spiritual journeys danced in prayers,
laced with pain and grace.

I am from daughters to grandsons.

I am from love –
assured and unconditional.

Congratulations on Word Award Nomination at The Word Guild Gala 2018

Well, the Good Grief People authors didn’t win the top prize last night at The Word Guild Word Awards Gala (we missed you, Alan) but we had a wonderful time meeting other authors and writers and hearing snippets of quality literature. We are proud to be declared a finalist in our category. One of our group did win a top award – congratulations to Glynis M. Belec for her win last night for her short script.

It was very special to have the group of us together. We got to know each other so well in the writing of our book and, even though we live in six different cities across Canada, we saw quite a bit of each other. To get us all together in one spot is a rarity and, therefore, I appreciated it all the more.

Just a couple of hours before I left for the gala, my phone rang. It was a woman from a funeral home in the area that had bought six of our books a year ago from me. If we need any more affirmation of the good things our book is doing for others on their grief paths, I got it. She raved about our book and ordered ten more Good Grief People books.

She told me they can’t keep the books on the shelf because people are finding it so helpful. She herself has found it to be so beneficial in understanding her own grief journey. She says it’s the perfect book in that it is not a ‘how-to’ book because those who are grieving already have enough on their plate without worrying whether they’re grieving properly or not. The short stories and poems are perfect for little snippets of comfort and hope given in small doses when needed.

I told her I was just getting ready to attend The Word Guild banquet today and that the book was short-listed for an award across Canada and she said she was not surprised.

It was wonderful to get such positive feedback. It was like getting an award. Thank you my Good Grief People author friends. We did it together.

Copies of Good Grief People can be ordered by messaging Barbara Heagy at barbaraheagy10@gmail.com or through local bookstores and retail outlets (The Bookshelf, Guelph; BookLore, Orangeville; Spa Wellness by Tamara, Guelph) or online at amazon.ca. They can also be ordered from any of the authors or through Angel House Publishing.

The Power of Telling Our Stories

Last night I attended the ‘Evening of Sharing – The Power of Telling Our Stories’ organized by Lisa Browning, One Thousand Trees Publications. The three speakers inspired me deeply with their unique life stories. They went beyond themselves and shared generously details of their lives from dealing with the death of a loved one, to writing our own stories instead of living through others, and mental illness and depression.

Margaret-Ann Brix shared her children’s story “Grampa’s Butterfly”, Melinda Burns, psychotherapist/writer/poet shared the importance of finding our true selves through writing and journaling, and Clay Williams spoke of his inspirational long distance runs for charity, specifically depression and mood disorders.

I bought Margaret’s book to share with my grandchildren and found her story to be a delightful metaphor on life and death.

Melinda began with a short meditation that focused and centered us. Her lesson was about mindfulness, being our true selves in the present moment. We can learn about ourselves by writing down our thoughts and feelings. She spoke of the difference between thinking, writing, and telling our stories. Writing is that safe space between thinking and telling, where we can record our thoughts and feelings in a safe space with no judgement from others.

Clay encouraged us to sign the Canadian flag that he carries with him when he runs in remembrance of someone we know who suffers with mental illness. “I would be honoured to run in their name,” he said. My signature joined hundreds of others to uplift those in my life that I care and pray for.

Thank you to all three speakers and to Lisa for organizing this special evening. Lisa holds “Evenings of Sharing” every month, each on a different theme. You can check them out at her website www.onethousandtrees.com.

10 Rules of Writing

A Facebook page that I belong to, Angel Hope Publishing, with Glynis M. Belec, had us consider an article she posted titled “10 Rules of Writing.” A blog entry by www.litrejections.com listed famous authors’ writing tips in a 10 point list form. It certainly showed the reader what kind of writer each author was and the value they put on their work. Many of them showed a great sense of humour. It really got me thinking about what I would put on my list if I made one. Here’s mine.

10 Rules of Writing

Consider your reading audience.

Always see your writing from the reader’s point-of-view. Your writing has to make sense. You have to feed them the story in an orderly fashion. Don’t assume they know what’s in your head.

Grammar and spelling are important but not always that important.

Consider the purpose of your writing and the audience. Is this just a quick note on social media or is this a published work that will be used for research or sold on a shelf and will be a valued piece of writing?

Write every day.

No matter how little. You learn to write by writing.

Write with spontaneity and flow.

Put your pen or pencil to the paper or your fingers to the keyboard and let that first draft just flow out of you without much conscious thought and little or no editing. There will be time for that later.

Show, don’t tell.

Good writers don’t just say, “She was happy.” They say, “Her lips curved into a slow smile, her eyes crinkled at the corners. A dimple began to form on her cheek.” Write using your senses, use descriptive words and phrases to paint a picture for the reader.

Use an editor before final publication.

A good editor, who gets you, will add rich feedback and a reader’s perspective on your writing. They will hone and refine your work. Your writing will be improved. There are many levels to editing from developmental to copy editing and they all must be covered before publication.

Read, read, read.

You learn from reading other authors’ works. They will inspire you and teach you by example.

Join a Writer’s Group.

Writing is such a solitary activity and you will find other writers will provide you with a living community for feedback, encouragement and ideas.

Input ideas, inspiration and energy every day.

Read a book, surf the Internet for stimulating articles and entries, go for a walk in nature, go sit on a bench and people watch. It doesn’t matter what you do, as long as you are enjoying it and find it relaxing, stimulating or fun. Julia Cameron “The Artist’s Way” calls these ‘artist dates’ and she recommends one a week. I recommend one a day, but then, hey, I am retired and have much more time. Do it at least once a week.

Market your work by building a strong platform.

Michael Hyatt, author, says to think of yourself as being at the back of a big arena with no microphone. You want to be noticed. But without a platform and a microphone no one will see you or hear you. It’s the same with your book. Talk up your book to everyone, use social media, seek speaking engagements, and get you and your writing out into the public eye.

My Food, My Love

This past weekend, I enjoyed two full days of writing experiences at the University of Guelph’s Writer’s Workshop. Writers, authors and speakers shared a variety of topics of interest to writers and I was able to enjoy five different workshops. I enjoyed ‘Writing and Mindfulness’ with Melinda Burns, ‘Spiritual Memoir’ with Susan Scott and Eufemia Fantetti, and ‘Self-Publishing Your Children’s Book’ with Lisa Browning, Heather Embree and Sherry Lee on Saturday. Sunday I learned about ‘Traditional Publishing vs. Self-Publishing’ led by Robert Pavlis and ended the day with ‘Writing From Where You Are’ with Nikki Everts-Hammond.

They all were of interest but the one I had the most fun with was the final one of the weekend, ‘Writing From Where You Are.’ Nikki had us writing from beginning to end of the three hour workshop on many short, quick, spontaneous prompts. This year I was hoping for more spontaneity and creativity in my writing and Nikki didn’t disappoint. It was a lot of fun and there was some time for sharing the wonderful results with the group.

My favourite piece I wrote was prompted from Nikki’s challenge to write about your relationship to food as though it were another person in your life. We were allowed five minutes to get it all down in one spontaneous swoop. I got to share it with the group and we had a lot of laughs. I hope you enjoy it too.

My Food, My Love

Get over here, you little cutie. You know I love everything about you. How you fit so nicely in my arms and hands. How warm you feel all snuggled up close. I just want to absorb your delicious smell, stroke your smooth shoulders and back, turn you around and let my eyes feast on your colours and shapes.

Then – then, I get to taste your deliciousness – a little bit sweet, a little bit spicy, always yumminess to my taste buds.

I love taking you in with small gobbles. First the lip caress, then the tongue flick, sometimes a big slurp when you are extra delicious. (Which most times you are.) Then, only after that first nibble, do I take a full bite, and a slow chew, and I roll you around on my tongue as my taste buds explode and sparkle like those chunky candies that go bang in your mouth.

But you don’t always taste that good. Sometimes you surprise me. You show up looking one way and tasting another. Like, you might be all yummy and creamy looking on the outside but the taste of you bites back when I put you in my mouth.

But, I have to admit – those days are few. Most days you are just my little cutie. And I love you.

Nikki Everts-Hammond, of Scripted Images, offers workshops in ‘Writing Your Life’ and ‘Writing Your Memoir.’ She can be contacted by emailing her at nikki@scripted-images.com or phoning her at 519-400-3528.

Sign-up for this popular series of workshops at University of Guelph happens in January and classes fill up quickly as these quality workshops are all offered for free in early March. More information is at #ugwriters. I’ll remind you next year of the upcoming date as it approaches. It’s fun and informative. I’m going to be going back again.

Gramma’s Gift

Yesterday, I was challenged to write a 50 word story about a box found in my deceased grandmother’s attic. The box had my name on it. What was inside?

Being a third generation Hungarian on both sides of my family, I have often wondered about my ancestral line. I was too young and busy in my life to care before my great-grandparents, grandparents, and parents died with all their stories and information. Tracing my ancestry is made more difficult by the fact that my grandparents surname was changed to a more Anglicized version that was easier for English tongues to say. Who knows what the original version is and how would I get that information?

My birth father died of cancer when I was just seven years old and mom remarried when I was nine. My life took a new direction and we began to see my original birth family on my father’s side less and less. It was a large family, nine brothers and sisters who married, had children and produced a large number of cousins for me and my brother and sister. I have seen them on occasion, but it was usually at a public or social function and as the years passed it was infrequent.

This past year I took a therapeutic touch workshop at my local YMCA/YWCA. I arrived early and sat down next to a man, the only other participant there. As the teacher was giving us our handouts, I turned to say something to him. My mouth dropped open!

“Uncle Frank!”

He looked confused until I said, “It’s Barbie, your niece.”

A big smile creased his face and after that we enjoyed reminiscing and spoke of old times until the class began. We decided that we would get together for a coffee some day and he agreed to help me fill in some of the holes in my memories and knowledge of my family.

Well, of course, some day never came until Glynis Belec’s online challenge to write the short 50 word story. I began researching my pet name ‘Boriska’ that I was called from birth by my mother’s Hungarian side of the family and was confused by what I found. I also wanted to find a Hungarian symbol that would be suitable as a potential gift to me from my grandmother. Neither searches were easy to do what with spelling and other nationalities mixed in with the results.

I decided to call Uncle Frank. He lives here in my own town. He answered a few of my questions but I wanted more information. We agreed that we would get together for coffee and a chat about our families in a couple of weeks. The date is set and written on my calendar and I am looking forward to it.

How much do you know about your ancestral line? I have learned that the sooner you get that information from your family, the better. Time has a habit of slipping away and all that information goes with it as family pass on.

Here’s my little 50 word story. It’s fictional but it reflects my Hungarian heritage.

Dad handed me the small velvet box. On it was a small tag with one word, ‘Boriska.’ Gramma’s pet name for me since I was a baby.

“I found it in her attic.”

Inside was a silver pendant of twisted leaves and a heart, an ancient Hungarian symbol of love.

Glynis, my author friend, gave us a great little writing prompt. It encouraged me to think deeper about my cultural background. Why don’t you try it? What would be in your box?

Choose to Live

At a recent writer’s retreat I attended, I was sharing my published books with another new writer friend. An author has to be able to say what his or her book is about in under 30 seconds, one or two sentences at the most. My keynote for my first book is “10 – A Story of Love, Life, and Loss, is an inspiring cancer story. It may uplift and encourage you to live your best life.” I often say “It’s an inspiring memoir/cancer journey/love story.”

Then, my friend asked me a simple question, one I had never been asked before so succinctly.

“So, how do you continue to live a quality life when you’ve been given a terminal diagnosis with no hope of a cure?”

Her succinct question demanded a succinct answer. She wanted to know in a few sentences how my husband and I did it.

I answered her this way, in list form: change your focus to ‘living’ rather than ‘dying,’ live in the moment, live with gratitude, and focus on your abilities, not your losses.

Focus on ‘living’ every day, rather than ‘dying.’ You try to fill your day with as many life-fulfilling activities and people as you can, and you focus on those positive messages and feelings, rather than negative people, circumstances and thoughts.
Live in the moment, with mindfulness, tapping into all your senses. Taste that juicy apple, smell that scented rose, look up at the sky and the clouds floating by, feel the softness of your child’s cheek, listen to the sounds of nature all around you. Often, the simplest things are the most meaningful.
Live with gratitude. Say thank you. When you awake, be grateful for another day given, and when you go to sleep, say thank you for all you received.
Focus on what you can do, rather than what you can’t do. In spite of impending losses, you still are capable of many things. Use your time to enjoy doing those things you can still do.

“10 – A Story of Love, Life, and Loss’ is a story of struggle, pain and loss, but at the heart of it, it is a story of love, hope, and strength. It is a story that may help others who have been given a life-debilitating diagnosis, as well as helping their caretakers and loved ones who journey with them.

My book can be purchased at The Bookshelf, Guelph; BookLore, Orangeville; Hannelore Headely Old & Fine Books, St. Catharines and Spa Wellness Tamara, Guelph. It can also be purchased directly from me by messaging me. Buy it online at amazon.ca.