Thank you, Samantha

Yesterday I spent several hours trying to work out my printer problems. I finally gave up and called the company HP Smart for technical support. The technician who I was hooked up with was called Samantha. Now, normally these calls can be hours long (which it was) and can be full of frustration and annoyance (which it wasn’t).

Because a variety of attempts to clear up my problem were needed, we both acknowledged that this was going to take a long time and some of the downloading processes were going to be very slow. We both settled in for the long haul.

For the next two or three hours, Samantha and I worked together to try and solve my problems. Meanwhile, we got to know each other as two human people with much in common. Even though we were separated by half a world (she was in India, I was in Canada), she seemed much younger than me (that’s an assumption), and we were two complete strangers, we connected.

She initiated the conversation and we quickly found out that we both had a love of writing, I a published author/a memoirist and she a daily journal writer and poet. We shared our losses in life of those close to us, including our beloved pets. We told stories about our loved ones. We shared our favourite poets and some of their work. We both love Mary Oliver. We laughed and cried and found common ground in our zest for life.

Slowly she helped me work out my printer problem and slowly we go to know each other as new friends. We both acknowledged that wouldn’t it be wonderful if we should meet some day face-to-face. When all was finally cleared and my printer was working again, it was time to say goodbye. “I’m having trouble saying goodbye,” she said. “Me, too,” I said. “Thank you for all you did for me and shared with me. You were wonderful.”

Will I ever talk with Samantha again? That would be unlikely for you know that when you call these companies, you are given a random agent, whoever is free at the time. But I am thankful for the time spent with Samantha. We had a very special connection.

Reach out to others. Despite distance and age and circumstances, we are all human. Thank you, Samantha. I enjoyed getting to know you. You made my day very special. In honour of you let me share your favourite Mary Oliver poem with others as you shared with me.

“When Death Comes.”

When death comes
like the hungry bear in autumn;
when death comes and takes all the bright coins from his purse

to buy me, and snaps the purse shut;
when death comes
like the measle-pox;

when death comes
like an iceberg between the shoulder blades,

I want to step through the door full of curiosity, wondering:
what is it going to be like, that cottage of darkness?

And therefore I look upon everything
as a brotherhood and a sisterhood,
and I look upon time as no more than an idea,
and I consider eternity as another possibility,

and I think of each life as a flower, as common
as a field daisy, and as singular,

and each name a comfortable music in the mouth,
tending, as all music does, toward silence,

and each body a lion of courage, and something
precious to the earth.

When it’s over, I want to say: all my life
I was a bride married to amazement.
I was the bridegroom, taking the world into my arms.

When it’s over, I don’t want to wonder
if I have made of my life something particular, and real.
I don’t want to find myself sighing and frightened,
or full of argument.

I don’t want to end up simply having visited this world.

—Mary Oliver

Writing Your Life Story

Back in September 2022, I joined a local Memoir Writers’ Club that meets weekly. The focus is on writing our life stories as an autobiography, written in chronological order.  Jennifer, our group leader, wrote her own memoir during COVID isolation and felt that perhaps others would like to record their life story. She felt led to offer her experience and guide other seniors through the process.

I joined the club because I had a memoir-in-progress titled “For the Love of Food – Family Edition” and wanted the company of other writers for feedback and encouragement. I have been working on my memoir/cookbook for about a year now and am now about ½ way through it. It is unusual, not your standard memoir, but I feel led to write it in this form and am enjoying it immensely.  I truly see food as a love language and I can see how food has shaped my life through five generations of my family. I am aiming to publish it for a public market. I am continuing with my book, in my own way, but I do enjoy our class and don’t mind writing on the topics suggested by Jennifer. My book has and will be taking a totally different form than what she has suggested to other club members but I have still found our class to be of value to me. The stories bring back many memories and are good writing practice.

I think our class is very special. There is definitely a desire for all of us to record our stories. I think the reasons for writing our life stories may differ and, perhaps, some may not even know why they want to write, and yet the need and desire is there. Some write because their family has requested it. Some may write truly for themselves as an assessment of their own lives. We all want to know our lives matter. We want to know we left a mark. We value our memories and want a record of them left behind. Perhaps our families are not the least bit interested in reading them at this time but, one never knows, there may come a day when they are glad to have the stories and the information and memories they contain. I know my own daughters didn’t value their old journals from school but as they aged and had children of their own, now they do. Perhaps some day our stories may be of value and interest and be read by many others as snapshots from the past.

There is no doubt that there is a close bond that has been built in our group. I keep attending and writing, even though I won’t be publishing my stories in the way suggested. I love hearing other’s stories and sharing our lives. I love story! And we all have them. We all think, “I have nothing of interest to others” but, in the end, we do. Sharing our simple memorable moments is a wonderful way to share our lives and identify with each other or learn new things. Even if we all visit Paris, we each will have a unique story to tell about it from our own perspective. There is value in that.

Thank you, Jennifer, for your gentle and encouraging guidance. You have given us an opportunity to remember our lives and share them with others. I have a new group of friends. It’s what keeps us coming.