Mysterious
monoliths are popping up all over the world. A friend thank you, Meg Brubacher)
posted pictures of this global news and asked her Facebook friends what they
thought of them.
I told her I
think it’s very cool. Just the distraction into magical thinking that we need
in these troubling times. Who is doing it? I’m guessing artists and artisans
from all over the world who are using their joined creativity for all of our
benefit. We all need a dose of magical thinking.
Christmas is
already full of potential for magical thinking. Santa’s global journey in a sled
full of toys is pretty amazing. For me, the original story of a baby born in a
manger, visited by shepherds and wise men is the most magical and mysterious
story of all.
These times
are challenging me to dig deep into my own beliefs and ways of thinking to
decide what really are the most important traditions and meanings of Christmas
for me. It’ll be a simpler Christmas, still with a decorated Christmas tree,
brightly wrapped presents under its boughs, burning logs in the fireplace, and
a turkey in the oven. Although family and friends will be separated, we will
find new ways to connect via FaceTime and short outdoor visits. What I can’t
give to my family, I’m sharing with others through local food banks, churches,
toy drives and other initiatives. Thoughts of community, community building,
and quiet worshipful time is adding a depth of meaning to Christmas for me that
is accentuated by the pandemic and its limitations.
What ‘s most
important to you this Christmas? What traditions and activities are you holding
on to in spite of the pandemic? I’d love to hear your thoughts.
As fall approaches, the weather is getting cooler and soon enough we will be smack into winter. I am dreading the thought of being stuck inside for days and weeks on end. Already I have been brainstorming ways of embracing the outdoor winter season rather than avoiding it. Well, as it turns out, the Norwegians have a word for this — friluftsliv – which roughly translates into ‘open air living.’ It gives the Norwegians a mindset that embraces being in nature and the outdoors at any time of the year in any kind of weather.
In March, as COVID-19 pushed me away from others and close contact, I began to seek more outdoor activities. For me this spring and summer, that meant embracing gardening in a big way as my daughter and I created a beautiful COVID garden in what had been a weed-filled lot.
I walked more – everywhere – throughout my own neighbourhood streets as well as established trails, parks, and conservation areas.
I began taking more outdoor photographs again and enjoyed editing and sharing them with others on social media.
I also began fishing again, something I used to do in abundance years ago before my children were born and city living became the norm.
Now, with the change in weather, I am seeking activities that will get me outdoors enjoying nature in the snow and ice. I am returning to snowshoeing and have been contemplating getting a pair of cross-country skis. I may take up ice-fishing. I can continue to take pictures and may even enjoy an outdoor picnic in the snow.
Whatever I choose, it really means embracing a mindset that enjoys being outdoors, whatever the weather. Winter is a beautiful and unique time of year. Let’s all do some ”friluftsliving” and get outside and enjoy nature and all its benefits no matter what the season.
(For those who would like to read more about it, look for “Friluftsliv: Connect With Nature the Norwegian Way” by author Oliver Luke Delorie.) Photograph credit – Andrew Fearman
At my house, my daughter Brittany has been staying with me during COVID-19. We found an old crokinole board and pieces in a basement closet and we are having so much fun playing some fast-paced games. The Scrabble board is getting well-used and we have had some fun and laughter playing Scattergories. An old crossword book has been dug out of the closet to add some variety to it all. We haven’t used it yet but the old Wii has been set up on the TV for some golf and bowling games.
Here are some ideas for other board games, for singles and or couples or groups. What are some of your favourite games to play during COVID-19? I’d like to know.
I read an
interesting article this morning when I opened up my computer — “Lockdown
was supposed to be an introvert’s paradise. It’s not” by Abby Ohlheiser in
online Technology Review. It speaks of this lockdown and social isolation we
are all experiencing with COVID-19. Introverts feel relieved. Finally! They
love social isolation and are good at it and yet they have always been
criticized for it and pressured into being more socially active. Suddenly we
are all in the same boat, stuck at home.
Ohlheiser says, “[A]s people began to adjust to isolation, they started to
find ways to bring their outside social lives into their homes.
People are coping with the coronavirus pandemic by upending their lives and
attempting to virtually re-create what they lost. The new version, however,
only vaguely resembles what we left behind . . . The result, for introverts,
extroverts, and everyone in between, is the bizarre feeling of being socially
overwhelmed despite the fact that we’re staying as far away from each other as
we can.”
I know I have experienced this. I am an extrovert and have always been on the
go, attending a workout class or club, taking a workshop, and visiting family
and friends. When I was suddenly thrust into my own home with nowhere to go, I
found instant relief on the Internet. In one day, I took part in a Sound Bath
Get-Together, sat with others for a short meditation, took an online dance
session, and that night attended an online Slam Poetry session, as well as
chatting it up with family and friends on both my telephone and video chat. In
between I could cruise through Facebook and my e-mail catching others comments,
jokes, memes, games, poetry and online journals or virtually wander through a
museum or art gallery. If that wasn’t enough, I could Netflix binge or watch
the constant stream of media attention on the latest coronavirus news
worldwide.
I was able to do it for one day. It was overwhelming. I realized I had replaced
my busy life with a virtual one, one that wasn’t at all like the real thing. So
I began to read, write, cook, and clean. Now I go outside for long walks with
my camera in hand, carefully taking into consideration government bylaws and
suggestions as they change daily, practising six foot social distancing,
washing my hands and changing clothes when I return to my own home.
It is difficult adjusting to this isolated virtual world. We have been told by
the experts that this could go on for 1 1/2 to 2 years. If it does, we all will
be changed. Let us hold on to our humanity, be aware of loving and caring for
our small circles, those most important to us, and finding healthy connections
wherever we find them through nature and other life-building activities. All
the best to you. Someday this will end.
This New Year’s Day I found myself reluctant to make any big
resolutions. I am such a goal-oriented person and when I make a goal, I
make a back-up plan for how it will come to pass, and then I’m checking
my progress along the way at specific signposts. It has often become
work rather than play. Meaningful work at the time but this year I
thought, “Nah, I don’t feel that driven. I don’t want to put myself
through that.”
And yet, I do want to move forward as a person. This year
my aim is “To Love Better.” It sounds too simple and wishy-washy but it
has big output when it’s put into place. I want to increase my circle
to enlarge my world and take a bigger stand in it.
I want to listen better, contact you more often, be interested and care
about you. I want to be more generous in my gifts of all kinds whether
that be time, finances, or material goods. I want to be braver in
stepping forward to be in your life. I have learned that I don’t need to
be intimidated by you, we are all equally worthy.
I want to be
more aware. I don’t need to be overwhelmed by you and your life. I don’t
need to solve all your problems and take them on as my own. I just need
to be there for you in small little doses or in bigger, more extended
ways if it feels right and it’s helpful for us both.
I want to
be more attentive, watch for the moments when I can step forward — by
opening a door, letting you go ahead of me in line, helping carry your
packages. I want to stop turning my back on world problems and learn
about them and take responsibility for them. I can’t solve them but I
can take little steps to change myself and my little place in the world
by cutting down on my garbage output, my use of energy resources, and
contributing to causes that promote good environmental practices. I can
write about world problems and offer solutions guided by others to
spread the word and offer aid when needed.
I would be amiss if I
forget to include loving myself in my resolution. I want to focus on
good health practices, by watching my diet, exercising regularly, and
taking time for mental and spiritual growth.
I want to love my
God, my spiritual guide better. I want to read more, talk more, learn
more, share more, pray more, listen more. I want to be open and
receptive. I want to be quieter and attend to You more.
It’s
already sounding bigger and more complicated, isn’t it? It doesn’t have
to be. All I have to do is keep my little mantra in mind, and in every
instance in my life just keep saying it, “Love better.” When I start to
whine and complain and I just want to give up, I say to myself, “Love
better.” When you begin to irritate me and I find myself wanting to
strike back in anger with bitter words or walk away, I say to myself,
“Love better.” When I’m feeling overwhelmed and know that I deserve
attention too, I say to myself, “Love better” and attend to my own
needs.
It’s only two days away and Christmas will be upon us. Each year I make Christmas simpler and simpler and yet I still hold on to many of my traditions that make the holiday festive. It’s not easy to hold back as we move through the season. Stores flaunt and push their wares. People around us are rushing here and there filling their carts with gifts and foodstuffs and often overextending themselves in both energy and money. I have had to hold myself in check and stick to a budget so I don’t get carried away too.
For me, it’s important to have a tree up in my home but I brought out fewer decorations and lights this year. It’s still beautiful. Gift buying and wrapping was finished earlier than ever for me and it feels wonderful to have the presents all wrapped and under the tree waiting for our celebration on Christmas Day. Family are coming for several days and I am getting the floors swept, the rugs vacuumed, and tabletops dusted.
I’m not a baker and so I felt very lucky to find a Cookie Extravaganza at a local church and was able to buy dozens of fresh, homemade cookies ready to share with friends and family.
For a month now, I have been attending lunch and dinner parties with small groups of friends as we celebrate our long-time friendships. It has been much more meaningful to take part in smaller, more intimate groups rather than large noisy parties.
I always seek out an opportunity to take part in some sing-along Christmas carolling and I also enjoy attending my grandson’s Winter Celebration at his school. This past weekend I attended a wonderful Winter Concert at our local theatre and have been listening to Christmas music non-stop.
I always appreciate the outdoor light displays and have been able to enjoy them over this month as so many have generously decorated their homes and yards for community benefit. The local town puts on its yearly display in a park and it’s tradition to go for a nighttime walk through the sparkling paths.
I’ve taken some moments to think about those who may not be having a joyful season. There are many suffering from past losses and I have taken time to write, pray, and share with others who have needed some extra love this season. There are many that financially just don’t have the resources to partake in all the Christmas buying and preparations. I have donated food, gifts, and money to others to add a little extra to their lives this holiday as others have done for me and my family in the past during difficult times.
Christmas crafts with my grandkids, and some minimal card and letter writing have nicely rounded out the preparations for the Christmas Day celebration. I have been busy but not as busy as I have in other years. I enjoy my traditions but have tried to not let them overwhelm me. We get caught up in the hustle and bustle in our attempts to achieve that ultimate Christmas that we hold as the ideal. I was in the library the other day and an older woman was complaining to the librarian. “I hate Christmas. All the gifts and wrapping and food preparation. And then there’s the house cleaning. It’s too much! I’m going home to lie down. I’m exhausted already.” I looked at the clock and noted that it was only 10:00 a.m. Why does she do this to herself?, I thought.
I hope that the Christmas preparations haven’t overwhelmed you. Try and keep things simple. Think about what’s really important to you and focus on that. For me, that’s family time. It doesn’t matter what we’re doing as much as taking the time to just be with each other. I also take time to reflect and refocus on ‘the reason for the season’ as I think about that little Babe born long ago. It’s a magical story.
Merry Christmas everyone. Enjoy your holiday time, whatever you do.
December 1, Advent, the beginning of the Christmas season.
Christians use it as a preparation for the commemoration of the birth of Jesus as they move through the next 24 days with hope, peace, joy, and love.
Much of the world prepares in other ways. Little children use it as a countdown for the coming of Santa Claus and open each small door on their chocolate Advent calendars with anticipation and excitement.
For me, it’s the beginning of a season for stopping to think about my own spiritual journey and relationship to Christ. I, also, join the rest of the secular world in carrying on and enjoying all the traditions of this special time of year as I put up my Christmas tree, bake the shortbread cookies, buy and wrap the gifts and watch the Christmas specials on TV.
It’s a special season that’s for sure. We have 24 days to prepare our homes and hearts for December 25 and all that it means to us. Enjoy it. Take part in your community events. Sing Christmas carols. Read the Christmas stories. Attend the concerts. Gather together in parties and feasting. Exchange gifts with your loved ones as well as those less fortunate as you.
Whatever you do, celebrate in whatever way is most meaningful to you and yours. May all the excitement and anticipation of the season be yours as you keep your traditions alive.
Reading Mark Nepo’s “The Book of Awakening” last night, I found this
beautiful passage and contemplation of the Nautilus shell creature that
with time becomes a spiral shell. As it builds a new layer, it only
resides in the newest chamber, leaving the other chambers to be full of
liquid or a gas to aid buoyancy.
Nepo uses the Nautilus as a
metaphor and lesson for our own lives: “…live in the most recent
chamber and use the others to stay afloat. . . Can we internalize where
we’ve been enough to know that we are no longer living there? When we
can, life will seem lighter . . . only time can put the past in
perspective, and only when the past is behind us, and not before us, can
we be open enough and empty enough to truly feel what is about to
happen.”
As hurting,
wounded humans, we carry our pains and traumas around as added baggage
that weigh us down and affect our daily lives in negative ways. Would
that we could leave the weights of our stings and distress behind and
move ourselves forward into our new lives, like the Nautilus, using our
past tribulations to hold us up rather than hold us down.
How we
do that is not easy. For me, research, reading, talking to others,
listening to others, journal writing, quiet contemplation and
meditation, walks in nature, and prayer all help me to internalize my
life journey and then step back with the lessons I’ve learned to move in
a positive forward direction. “Be here now” is a mantra that is built
on our past experiences by not denying our past but not being weighed
down and led by it.
Margaret looked into the bathroom mirror
as she did every morning. She ran her fingers through her hair, eased out the
tangles. Picking at the corner of her eye, she rubbed away the sleepiness of
the night. As she leaned in to the mirror, she flexed her lips to check for
stray pieces of food caught in her teeth. Stepping back, she glanced down for a
moment and then back up to greet the face in the mirror. She struck her pose,
her best look. Turning her face slowly to the right, then the left, she
examined the small wrinkles at the corner of her eyes. “That’s okay, they’re my
smile lines,” she told herself confidently. The same smile lines curved down
from either side of her nose to the edges of her lips. As if to prove it to
herself, she smiled once at the reflection. And that’s when she noticed it.
A little spark, a twinkle in her
eyes, a flash of mischief, looked back at her. Her silly, get-into-trouble
three-year old face was still there, looking for the next amusement that would
send her into high-pitched giggles and squeals of delight. She stuck her tongue
out at it. No wonder she enjoyed her little grandson so much. He gave her
licence to let the little girl out once in a while, to romp and play and be
enchanted by the simple pleasures of life once again.
She took one step back away from the
mirror and looked past that little girl to another reflection. This time a
young girl, an almost woman, stood shyly in front of her. Margaret could see the
bloom on her cheek, the tightly closed lips afraid to say the wrong thing, the
averted eyes edged with long, curling lashes, that cautiously looked up at her,
then quickly looked away again as they made eye contact. Margaret knew she
still lived inside of her. Every time Margaret was faced with a new social
situation, a new challenge at work, the insecure young girl appeared, telling her
she just wasn’t ready, didn’t know enough, wasn’t capable of grand achievement.
Margaret stood a little taller,
pulled herself erect into the whole woman she knew she could be. She looked
again at the reflection. This time, she saw a grown woman. A woman about to be
married. A woman who loved and knew she was loved. The face was rounder, the
lips fuller, the eyes shone in confidence. It was a sensuous face, a glowing
face, a face that was about to embark on a new journey with a man who loved
her. Margaret could see the future in that face, full of promise, children, and
new adventures. Margaret smiled at the reflection. It, too, was still a part of
her.
But then she eased herself back into
her own form. She stood a little less at attention, relaxed into the older body
that was hers that morning. She looked back intently at the mirror. The face she saw this time was even fuller, a
little saggy, a few more wrinkles than she had first admitted to. But the eyes
were calm, all-knowing, all-accepting. She was proud of that face – proud of
every gray hair on her head, proud of every crease on her cheek and forehead.
She was now a mature woman, a woman that was an accumulation of all her life
experiences. A woman that had lived a rich, meaningful life; one of joy and
pain, sorrow and celebration, and a full acceptance of it all. None of it was
lost. It was still all there, reflected back at her from that beautiful face in
the mirror.
For many years, I taught jazz dance at a local dance school called The Orangeville Top Cats. At the end of each year, our students performed in a big dance recital at the high school, always to a packed gym.
I used to tell my students that once they were out there on that stage, just let themselves get caught up in the flow and energy of the experience and give it all they had. If they made a mistake, they were to do it boldly, just make it part of the dance. Don’t grimace, don’t stop, don’t get intimidated and think badly of yourself. Make your mistake part of the dance and keep on dancing with confidence and certainty until you can find your way again. People watching you won’t know you made a mistake if you do it with conviction. They will think “Oh, that was a nice little solo.”
When we give 100% to anything, when we are caught up in the moment, open and vulnerable, but assured of ourselves that no matter what happens, we will just keep dancing, well, that’s living, really living.
